What to do instead of making your child say sorry...

1. Comfort the child who was on the receiving end of the physical communication. 

2. Spend some time with the child who expressed themselves physically and talk about what had happened.

The teacher might say something like, “I don’t think NAME liked that very much. They look sad."Then the teacher will usually remind the child that they have to keep their hands on their own body. 

3. Instead of asking them to say sorry, they talk about ways to make their classmate feel better, i.e. offering them a tissue, and then provide them with the words they could use next time.

For example:  “If NAME is standing too close to you, next time you can tell her that you need some space.” 

In the early years, A LOT of time is spent helping children find the words they need in situations like this.  

Model Apologizing At Home

Rather than expecting your child to say sorry before they fully understand the meaning of the word, you can model saying sorry at appropriate times - show them how and when it’s used. 

Teach them that it’s not just about saying the word, but about repairing what just happened and taking action to make things right.

With this exposure, children will naturally start to incorporate the word into their vocabulary while also learning how to use it appropriately. 

They’ll also start to hear it a lot more at school as they grow and more children around them develop empathy.

In the end, you can ask your child to apologize but make sure you’re including a lesson in empathy with it. 

If they’re quick to say “sorry” without much thought, I would suggest asking them to say what they’re sorry for. 

This helps draw their attention to how their behaviour affects others and encourages a deeper understanding, rather than just repeating the word.