3 Ways To Reduce Picky Eating at Mealtimes

2 min read

Offering your child independence around mealtime is a great way to reduce picking eating.

Mealtime battles and picky eating are often the result of a lack of control - children don't usually get to decide when to eat, what to eat, or how much food is put on their plate.

As humans, even very little ones, autonomy is important. When we take that away, it often leads to frustration and pushback.

If we can give children some control and independence around mealtimes, it will likely:

encourage them to try new things
feel less frustrated with the limits we do impose - i.e. the food available at each meal
lead to less stress for everyone

3 Ways To Support Independence At Mealtimes

1. Invite your child to serve themselves:

Demonstrate how you serve yourself, then invite your child to have a turn with tongs, a spoon, and/or a small pitcher for water.

Being able to choose how much to serve themselves will also help your child to start considering others, i.e. If I take all the apples from this bowl, I won’t leave any for my family. Allowing children to serve themselves also helps them to learn how to listen to their body’s hunger cues rather than being served a portion of food determined by someone else.

Portion parts of the meal into small bowls they can manage.
Expect spills. It’s helpful to keep a small towel handy and treat clean up as part of the learning.

2. Encourage your child to set their own place at the table:

Store your child-sized dishes, utensils, and cups in a low, accessible drawer/cupboard. This will make it easier for your child to help themselves.
You can also use a placemat with the outline of where each item goes - plate, fork, cup, etc. We offer this silicone one but you can also print and laminate this printable.
Show them how to carry each item, one at a time with two hands, and match it to their spot at the table.

3. Include your child in the cleanup:

Show them how to scrape food into the compost or garbage, let them carry dishes to the sink or dishwasher, and show them how to sweep the floor and wipe down their table together when finished.

Click here to view our step-by-step guide on teaching children how to sweep.

It Shouldn't Be All or Nothing

Encouraging independence at mealtimes does not need to be an all or nothing approach. Incorporate the parts that make sense for your family, the amount of space you have, etc.

Remember to follow the child. Building independence takes practice and energy.

Some days your child might need more help, and that’s okay. Some days you may want to skip setting the table or portion out meals in the kitchen rather than serving them family-style, and that’s okay too!

The goal here is to introduce these skills at an early age, inviting your child to participate in day to day tasks, laying the foundation for them to feel confident, capable and responsible as they grow.